Today has been an interesting day to say the least. Last night me and Elena had a few beers and shots, so I had a mediocre case of the runs this morning. When I got to work I realized that there was an open rehearsal so all of the good restrooms wouldn’t be completely vacant like they normally are. So I had one choice, the staff restroom. Now, normally I wouldn’t really care about using this restroom but I felt especially private this morning and was hoping to take a nice, unrushed, peaceful dump. Oh boy, as I’m getting settled in the unthinkable happens. Someone, who’s identity I thankfully never learned, entered the stall next to me and proceeded to do his business. It wasn’t the gnarliest thing I’ve ever heard, but I was thinking about giving this guy my doctor’s business card. I won’t describe it in detail but “subtle squirts” sums it up. I quickly finished, and as I was washing my hands he flushed the toilet; I sprinted back to the comfort of the mailroom.
Work related injury…